Updated: Mar 14

(Balanced) Family System: Father is most important to Mother & Mother is most important to Father (primary level) & child/children and other family members (secondary level) should know this.

As children, for natural mental/spiritual/physical developmental growth, one should be free to be a child!

Engulfed by mother/father to fill in as their surrogate spouse, the inner-child gets resentful, angry for its unmet needs… and goes into hiding. The covert rule is: ‘if I’m unhappy, you can’t be happy’.

The clueless child feels guilty & anxious for needing his/her needs!

Soul-splitting baggage to keep the parent happy instead of another way round destroys a carefree childhood.

The child abandons itself to be a good ‘son’/‘daughter’ so that he/she gets approval & love, his basic need, from the source figures.

In many cases, children play a scapegoat in the conflicting couple triangle to keep the family system alive. Here the physiological & spiritual needs of so called ‘family’ remains unsupported and unresolved.

This neglect results in being out of touch with our own needs & emotions.

The primary imbalance leads to incompleteness, emptiness, and low-grade depression.

In family cross-generational enmeshments, children take on their parents’ insecure issues losing sight of their individuality as a whole.

I don’t know who I am!

I’ve no idea what MY needs & wishes are?

Who am I?


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